Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I think I sprained my soul last night
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
