Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
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