I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize