I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize