i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize
