god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Randomize
