$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
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