I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Even the bartender felt bad for me
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize