I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
