this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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