And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
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