That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize
