my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
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