making cat noises will not fix the situation.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I need to sanitize my soul.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
Randomize