apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
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