member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize