No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
