he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Randomize
