dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
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