She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
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