Heybabeimwearingurpanties
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Randomize
