Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
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