Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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