Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Randomize