i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Randomize
