I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize