cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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