How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Every concussion has its silver lining
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
