made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Randomize
