I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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