dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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