..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
