I cockslap morals
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
