Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Randomize