why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
His nipple licking is glorious
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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