Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
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