Screwed.edu
I smell stomach acid.
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
i now understand why vodka
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
