I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
im on a boat
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