So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize
