This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
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