Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
Randomize
