hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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