Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Randomize
