just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
Hippo gnu deer
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Randomize
