Texts From Last Night

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  (563): View more from Iowa

  I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.

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  (563): I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever. http://tfl.nu/ydd6
  Replies (20) Good night (1158) Bad night (4673)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.

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  (910): too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time. http://tfl.nu/w0g5
  Replies (17) Good night (4417) Bad night (816)
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  (425): View more from Washington

  if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you

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  (425): if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you http://tfl.nu/ohu0
  Replies (13) Good night (5577) Bad night (1276)
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  You just said the magic words

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  (484): We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE. (610): You just said the magic words http://tfl.nu/8k47
  Replies (24) Good night (5950) Bad night (1204)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.

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  (570): I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up. http://tfl.nu/kls9
  Replies (14) Good night (1281) Bad night (4018)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok

  (850): View more from Florida

  They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good

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  (850): I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok (850): They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good http://tfl.nu/qtm7
  Replies (10) Good night (6731) Bad night (1992)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.

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  (919): i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving. http://tfl.nu/oull
  Replies (26) Good night (8055) Bad night (2190)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?

  (1-651): View more from Minnesota

  yeah you don't forget that shit easily

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.

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  (651): You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"? (1-651): yeah you don't forget that shit easily (651): We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email. http://tfl.nu/xfpa
  Replies (11) Good night (4846) Bad night (844)
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  (631): View more from New York

  does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?

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  (631): does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you? http://tfl.nu/fswy
  Replies (6) Good night (1626) Bad night (799)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.

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  (304): Malt liquor mondays...better in theory. http://tfl.nu/6cjj
  Replies (2) Good night (873) Bad night (654)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.

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  (330): OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX. http://tfl.nu/l62p
  Replies (7) Good night (1788) Bad night (584)
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now

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  (604): yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now http://tfl.nu/b5id
  Replies (8) Good night (542) Bad night (1160)
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  (904): View more from Florida

  Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven

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  (904): Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven http://tfl.nu/577t
  Replies (4) Good night (1284) Bad night (474)
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  (310): View more from California

  I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.

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  (310): I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl. http://tfl.nu/jncu
  Replies (3) Good night (841) Bad night (483)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't

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  (908): it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't http://tfl.nu/5cpt
  Replies (1) Good night (515) Bad night (237)

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