false alarm. still invincible.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Randomize
