were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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