We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
Randomize
