I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
And then he peed in my hair
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