i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
pop tarts are not kleenex
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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